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- She grew on him like E.
coli
and he was room temperature Canadian beef.
- Her vocabulary was as
bad,
as, like, whatever.
- She had a deep throaty
genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before he throws up.
- From the attic came an
unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie surreal quality, like when
you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7 pm
instead of 7:30!
- Her hair glistened in
the
rain like nose hair after a sneeze.
- He fell for her like
his
heart was a mob informant and she was the east river.
- The Ballerina rose
gracefully
en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire
hydrant.
- She walked into my
office
like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
- It was an American
tradition,
like fathers chasing kids with power tools.
- He was deeply in love.
When
she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck
backing up.
- The hailstones leaped
up off
the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
- John and Mary had never
met.
They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
- They lived in a typical
suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy
Kerrigan's teeth.
- He was as lame as a
duck. Not
the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually
lame. Maybe from stepping on a landmine or something.
- His thoughts tumbled in
his
head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without
Cling Free.
- Her face was a
perfect
oval, like a circle that had its two other sides gently compressed by a
thigh master.
- He spoke with
wisdom
that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because
he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole
in it and now goes around the country speaking about the dangers of
looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in
it.
- He was as tall as
a six
foot three inch tree.
- The revelation
that his
marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity
came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge free
ATM.
- The little boat
gently
drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
- McBride fell 12
stories, hitting the pavement like a hefty bag filled with vegetable
soup.
- Long separated by
cruel
fate, the star crossed lovers raced across a grassy field toward each
other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m.
traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of
35 mph.
- Shots rang out,
as
shots are wont to do.
- The plan was
simple,
like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might
work.
- Her eyes were
like
limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser.
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